The 38 Ways to Happiness :- Artfulness in Speech (3)

Blessing Ten:
Artfulness in Speech

 

C. ARTFUL SPEECH
C.1 Definition
By artful speech we mean speech that has been carefully filtered and distilled by the mind as good, before it is allowed to pass our lips. It is not only speech that is better than nothing. It is speech that has been carefully selected by many criteria. It must be good from every viewpoint — so good that it cannot have any fault found in it. The reason why we must be careful with our speech is that however good our intentions if we say something in the wrong way we can still upset the people around us because they cannot see what we are thinking. All they can pick up is the words by which we express those intentions.

C.2 Components of speech
From the meaning communicated by the things people say we can identify three major components:

1. The Intention behind the Words: You can see whether the intention behind the things someone is saying is based on greed (e.g. they would like to get something from someone), hatred (e.g. in order to try to harm someone) or delusion (e.g. out of the envy of someone). These are all damaging forms of speech. If speech is used in a good way then the intention must be good. Good speech may be said out of compassion.

2. The Sort of Words Chosen: The more true they are the less false they are. The more polite speech is the less rude it is and vice versa. If the usefulness of words is reduced then they become more superfluous. Thus you can classify the speech of anyone in the world in terms of these three variables no matter what language it is spoken in:
        1.    True or Untrue
        2.    Polite or Rude
        3.    Useful or Superfluous Words are either true or false.

3. The Occasion Chosen to say them: Sometimes this means whether what is said is appropriate to the time available and the place where it is said.

C.3 Qualities of artful speech
Applying the general components of speech to artful speech, we find that there are five components. If speech is truly good it must be good to five levels. It is not like a one-star hotel which is better than a hotel with no stars. If we are truly principled in the things we say, then every word we say must be ‘five stars’. If it is any less, we will not let it pass our lips:

1. Speech must always be based on the intention of compassion: If the intention behind our speech is not compassion for the hearer then those words are better not said. Think for example of the sort of things you say when you are angry with someone and you will see that if you are angry its better to keep your mouth closed.

2. Speech must be true: (sort of words spoken) Supposing we would like someone to do a good deed (i.e. we have compassion for them) but to get them to do so we tell a white lie then it is no longer artful speech. Some people would like to cheer up a child so they say “Oh! Here comes the most precious boy in the world!” This could not yet be counted as artful speech — it is no more than words to fool children. The same thing even goes for telling “white lies” to fool people into doing beneficial things or the meaningless words exchanged between people in love.

3. Speech must be polite (sort of words spoken): If it is not polite it can never be artful speech. It is speech which ought to stay in the market place.

4. Speech must be useful (sort of words spoken): It should not something be said just to float on the breeze. Does it create benefit by making the mind of the speaker and the listener brighter? Does it create benefit both in this lifetime and the next? This doesn’t mean that we tell lies for our own benefit but by doing so we take advantage of others. Both speaker and listener must benefit as the result of the words spoken. Why bother telling someone that Mr. So-and-so is involved in corruption when everyone throughout the town already knows it to be a fact.

5. Speech must be at the appropriate time and occasion (the occasion chosen to say them): Even if you say the right thing but it is at the wrong time then you cannot consider it to be artful speech. You might want to give your husband or wife or friend a useful piece of criticism but if you do it in front of their boss it turns advice into a disgrace for that person. If you want to give your boss a warning you have to choose the appropriate time or else it might be seen as insult.

C.4 Special Considerations when giving criticism
The subject of appropriate occasion is something that is very hard to judge. In societies where there must be quality control and there does need to be evaluation and criticism of sloppy practices, then often one cannot wait for the right opportunity to come along by accident. In such a case you have to do your best to create the opportunity. Apart from keeping to all the five principles already mentioned, there are two extra considerations which you should bear in mind which can help to create favourable circumstances for giving criticism:

1. Praise them before you criticise them: A piece of criticism may take three pieces of praise to balance up the good feeling lost. The praise should always come first. Don’t forget that others have feelings too and even if someone has made a lot of faults you shouldn’t criticise them for any more than two faults per day or else you may
have a resignation on your hands.

2. Smile when you give the criticism: Don’t criticize out of anger.

If you ever say something to someone and you are surprised that it makes them angry, try checking the words that you said using the ‘five-star’ measure of artful speech mentioned above. If you do not filter your use of words carefully, then your words may cause harm to others. On other occasions, like a cup and a saucer must be of a matching quality, sometimes situations require words of a matching quality too. Sometimes it is good to speak in a way that is polite, but sometimes a situation doesn’t require it because in some exceptional circumstances, five star language is not appreciated.

C.5 Those who don’t appreciate artful speech
It is not as if you should speak in the most polite possible way to every person you meet. Some people cannot stand to hear polite language and may even criticize you because of it. They hear someone speaking clearly and accuse that person of being ‘affected’. In such cases you might need to lower the grade of politeness of the language you use to make your language more direct, to shock the person into awareness. However, the rest of the four components of good speech must remain intact. The following sort of people might need to hear direct speech:

1. Those who have a superiority complex or like to pretend that everyone is equal: Those who think they are God’s gift to the world. Such people will not profit from flowery speech. Sometimes they need to be shocked by the words they hear in order to change themselves for the better.

2. Those whose mind is blinded to the virtues of the speaker by their lack of faith for that person: This is especially true if someone's mind is still attached to practices that are diametrically opposed to the ones you are advocating. Thus you can speak flowery words until you are red in the face and they will still not be inspired by your words. Even so you must not give up trying to help such people!

3. Those who are in the midst of depression: For such people, flowery words are of no more use than flute music to a buffalo.

C.6 Praiseworthy Talk
In Buddhism, the most useful sort of talk is talk of virtue by one who exemplifies the virtue they are talking about. The Buddha taught that ten types of conversation which are praiseworthy are:
1.    one who wants little and talks on wanting little [appiccha];
2.    one who is contented and talks on contentment [santuṭṭhi];
3.    one who is loves seclusion and talks on seclusion [paviveka];
4.    one who loves solitude and talks on solitude [asaṃsagga];
5.    one who strives energetically and talks on energetic striving [viriya];
6.    one who is self-disciplined and talks on self discipline [sīla];
7.    one who has attained concentration and talks on concentration [samādhi];
8.    one who has attained wisdom and talks on wisdom [paññā];
9.    one who is has attained liberation and talks on liberation [vimutti], and
10.    one who is has attained seeing and knowing of liberation and talks on seeing and knowing of liberation [vimuttiñāṇadassana].

C.7 Characteristics of a peace envoy
One of the most useful applications of artful speech is to make the world a more peaceful place. Whenever there is conflict in society the reasons for people to do evil things are multiplied many fold. If we ever have the opportunity to encourage people to live together in peace and harmony it is something very meritorious for us to do. Anyone who is fitting to be an envoy of this sort should have eight characteristics which we should learn and train ourselves in so that we may be ready if ever we have the opportunity to take on this duty. In the future, no matter how many lifetimes we are born for we will always have friends and relatives who are peaceful and harmonious:

1. You must be able to listen to others opinions and not refuse their point of view: Some people like to hear only the sound of their own voice. They don't let others get a word in edgeways. Of course they can never find anyone to listen to them. Before becoming a good speaker you must train yourself to listen to other people first. Whether what another person is saying is right or wrong, at least give them the chance to say what they have to say and in that way you will be able to pick up the jest of that they have to say.

2. When you do speak, you must be able to capture your listener’s attention and hold it: That doesn’t mean just spending all your time listening to what others have to say but when it comes to your turn to speak then you should see to it that what you are saying is listened to. Don’t go speaking in a way that is irritating so that no one can listen to you for long.

3. Know how to set the boundaries for what you have to say to the minimum: If you are not able to limit the scope of what you have to say then it is like driving a cart along to chase a rabbit. This is what it is always like if the objective of what you have to say is not clear. There will be no end to what you have to say. Political negotiations will go on for seven days and seven nights and still reach no conclusion.

4. You must be able to remember what you have to say: Never use a forgetful person as your emissary.

5. Understand the detail of everything you have to say: It is not enough simply to be able to memorize the details.

6. Having the ability to make others understand what you have to say: This really takes a lot of ability. You must be artful in the use of metaphor and artful speech.

7. You must be skilled in selecting to say only useful things and cutting out the rest.

8. By habit you must be someone who is not fond of starting arguments: Never send anyone with a short temper as your ambassador unless you are planning to start a war.

Finally, in the words of the Buddha

“An ambassador is one who even in the company of the harsh-spoken, can remain unscathed and unruffled, makes no mistake in his use of words, doesn’t conceal information, has the ability to alleviate the doubts of others and who is not angered by questioning.”

(Vin. Culavagga 7/201)

C.8 Buddhist Principles of Public Speaking
There are many different recipes for success for public speaking in the world — including those of the Toastmasters or Carnegie, but in general, they do not have principles which deviate far from the principals already outlined above — except for aspects of the delivery. Buddhist principles of public speaking emphasize the following components:

1. Sound body: This includes all aspects of non-verbal communication

2. Sound speech: This means speech that is pleasant to the ears, eyes and mind of the listener:
1.    Being pleasant to the ear means possessing “Five Star” speech and includes the use of words, use of intonation and the rhythm of what is said.
2.    Being pleasant to the eye means the speaker having a pleasant personality and use of expression.
3.    Being pleasant to the mind includes appropriate choice of subject, being prepared, having one’s thoughts organized and structuring the speech into three parts: an introduction, main body and conclusion.

3. Sound mind: Exemplifying the virtues which you talk about.

Buddhist public speaking is not just talking to be understood or believed, but for the enjoyment and the inspiration of the listener to do good deeds.


 

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