Meditation Testimonial
Mrs. Chanapa Heart (New Zealand)
Mrs. Chanapa Heart (New Zealand)
I am Mrs. Chanapa Heart. My nickname is Oi (sugarcane). I am 53 years old. My husband is Mr. Juliet Heart. He is Dutch and 57 years old. We are the loyal fans of Inner Dream Kindergarten Program from New Zealand. I have installed DMC since 2005. I am addicted to Dhamma programs especially the Inner Dream Kindergarten program. I prefer to watch the live broadcast which is on air around 1:00 a.m. I always go to make merit at Orewa Meditation Centre and offer the meal to the monks every Friday. In addition, I am the consultant of Buddhist Club for Thai students in New Zealand.
Although I love to make merit but I do not like to meditate. I accept that I used to be lazy to meditate. If someone forced me to meditate, I would not do. I was stubborn.
When the teaching monk led the congregations to meditate, I would go away through the back door. Later, the teaching monks knew about that, he told me to sit in front of him when he led to mediate again. So I could not move anywhere. I remembered that I used to be stubborn with Luang Phaw too.
In January, 2004, I had a chance to pay respect to the Most Ven. Luang Phaw in Thailand for the first time and you told me to meditate at Panawat Garden but I did not go. Two years later, I decided to go to Panawat in the early of the year because I dreamed of Luang Phaw and in the dream Luang Phaw came to call me to meditate at Panawat Garden.
When I went there, it seemed that Luang Phaw wanted to break my lazy habit especially meditation. I understood that the lazy one must be improved by meditating a lot. During that week at Panawat, the attendants were scheduled to meditate a lot, eat and sleep a little. Firstly, I was bored. I fidgeted after I had meditated for less than 5 minutes. So I asked to go to the toilet for going out. When I was allowed to go out, I walked and saw something there as a stubborn one did.
In the later day I thought that I decided to go there, I should try as best as I can at least for one time and I thought I could do it. So, I went to the meditation room and looked at the picture of Phramongkolthepmuni. Then, I made a wish that I decided to come to meditate here, I asked him to help me not come back with nothing. After that I began to meditate and still my mind. I did for a while and I saw a Buddha image emerging in my abandon. I surprised how he came. Maybe Luang Pu gave me or I cheated myself. When I had had more questions, I opened my eyes and Buddha image disappeared.
Then, I tried again. I intended that if I saw something again, I would do nothing. When I did like that, the Buddha image was clearer and brighter. The Buddha image was transparent, bright, and bigger and bigger. He was very big and covered me. At that time I could not explain how much I was happy. I feel bright and light. It seemed this world was mine. My mind expanded to cover the world. The world was bright. The world was in my body.
I did not want to see the scenery of Panawat Garden because I was afraid to be homesick. The scenery of Panawat Garden was similar to my house in New Zealand. After I found the center of body, I was happy and felt that everywhere was my home. While I was meditating, I had a leg ache. Now while I am meditating I do not have a leg ache. But after meditating I have a leg ache.
Since I know how to meditate, my family is better. I got used to shout at my husband. We quarreled many times. We were angry easier. Now, we are calm. When I am angry, he is not or vice versa. Now I am cooler and calm. Everything around me is better.
My husband believes in meditation. Once, he was sick and had a heart operation, he meditated more and more. He told me that he saw a crystal ball but he could not bring it into his abandon. So I suggested him to think of it again and swallow. He did like that and he could see the crystal ball in his body. When his heart symptom recurred, he stilled his mind gently at the crystal ball. He told me that it made him better.
When I came back from Panawat that time, I had a chance to pay respect to Luang Phaw again and told you that I got the clear Buddha image as a souvenir for you. You taught me to remind continuously because if I had got and then lost it, it would be harder to get it again. You also told me to make New Zealand bright by Buddhism and Dhammakaya Vicha.
When I reached New Zealand, I was very busy because of my job. So I meditated less. One day I meditated, I did not see anything. I was scared and felt guilty that I had asked the Most Ven. Luang Pu to help, but when he gave it to me, I did it lost. So I restarted to meditate again. Before meditation, I made an apology and asked Luang Pu again that “Luang Pu and Luang Phaw, I am sorry. I am wrong because I had got it but not hold. Please give me again.” After making a wish, I sat to meditate. I meditated for a while and saw the Buddha image at my center of body again. In the first time he was not clear. I saw him only and then he became clearer. When he came back to me, I was very glad and thought that I would not lost him again.
Now, I kept in Dhamma more and more. Especially in this Buddhist lent, my mind was very bright and my Buddha image was very clear and bright too. He went with me all the time.
I would like to thank Luang Phaw, all of the teaching monks and the best friends who suggested and encouraged me until I am successful in meditation and know the real goal in my life. I would like to confirm all students of Inner Dream Kindergarten program that “Still your mind is the key to success” which Luang Phaw always teaches us everyday is absolutely true. Thank you.
