MeditationMeditation for PeaceHow to Manage Family Life #4Family members will be pleased and proud to be a part of a family that prizes this honest way of living.3) Body like a doormat means dedication all of one’s energy and dedicating one’s life to performing good deeds with virtuous actions, and thoughts, without attitudes or conditions.Our grandparents used this metaphor that compares the body to a doormat to teach us; they want to remind us, whatever task we perform, it must be an honest task. We must perform it using all of our knowledge, ability and virtue. We must not have an attitude or be arrogant. We must not be afraid of hard work and we must be able to dedicate our life to the task to produce the best results.Our grandparents also improved their lives by following this principle. Whenever they talk about their success, they can always speak with pride.For example, whenever they taught their children about the virtues of being honest, and knowing they had always been honest with every job they did throughout their lives, they could tell their stories proudly:“Ever since we were young, when we had to get a job, even if it was to empty or to clean the toilets, we would take that job, because it was an honest job. We pretended our bodies were doormats. But if the job was to rob someone, we definitely wouldn’t ever take it. We also rejected any job that involved cheating, deception, or fraud.”Working to support a family is a heavy responsibility, because every meal is bought with hard-earned money. A person, who works mindfully, never complains or has an attitude, and concentrates on working honestly will be proud that they earned the money to support the family with their energy and with the virtues of honesty. They will not have any regrets or be blamed at a later time.A peaceful mind comes from having an honest job. Although other people might look down on us for having a job with a lower status, we do not have anything to be ashamed of. We should be proud of our honest way of living, like the doormat that only serves to rid the dirt for our shoes without complaint, dislike, or partiality. A person who maintains a serene mind based on their honest living and lack of attitude, even with a job of lower status, will have grandchildren who are all willing to pay respect to them with pride.A person who concentrates on performing good deeds, working honestly, and making their body like a doormat will have a successful and peaceful mind; their body like a doormat will have a successful and peaceful mind; they will not be jealous of others. Their virtue will elevate and they will be good role models for their grandchildren. Family members will be pleased and proud to be a part of a family that prizes this honest way of living.Those who focus on performing good deeds, working honestly, being humble and not setting conditions prior to performing good deeds just like a doormat will have a more refined and peaceful mind, which is considered to be honorable in a marriage. And they will be good role models for the next generation. This is the third magic form of conduct that prevents divorce.A peaceful mind comes from having an honest job.4.) Mind like the earth means keeping a strong determination when performing the good deeds, without any conditions and unwavering in the face of obstacles.Our grandparents focused on this Dhamma lesson because they realized that, even though we dedicate all our energy and knowledge to perform good deeds, there are still obstacles that we encounter that are more serious than we can handle. Yet we must learn to handle these situations. In other words, even if we might not be able to it, we must learn to endure it.Base on this truth, whether we are content or not, as humans, we must learn to have calm and unwavering minds, not to be frightened of life’s uncertainties, and unwavering minds, not to be frightened of life’s uncertainties, and know how to remain alert, like the earth, which does not flinch at aromatic or smelly things that are thrown on it.The Lord Buddha once said to Venerable Rahula about the importance of keeping our mind still like the earth:“If a person pours perfume on the earth, will the earth be happy? No, it will be indifferent. If a person puts a smelly object on it, it isn’t sad. It remains indifferent.”“Rahula, you must control your mind in that manner. No matter what people do to you, do not do anything to them. Concentrate on your Dhamma practice and you will soon be able to rid yourself of defilements.”This means the more we suffer, the more we need to still our minds. When the mind is calm, no suffering will never ever distort wisdom and peace of mind.In the same way, the happier we are, the more we need to still our minds. Being filled with happiness will cause us to be negligent and erroneously believe that we are more privileged than others.So whenever we suffer or are happy, we must keep our minds calm and stable, in order to be ready for the events that follow.However, our minds tend to be dissimilar to the earth; the mind is more like wax that finds itself very soft, weak and stressed when close to a fire. When facing unexpected suffering, we find we cannot pull ourselves together, and often become hopeless, further increasing our level of suffering. Sometimes, we become cynical with life, thereby bringing more sorrow to ourselves.People in this situation can feel really hopeless. The distress, torture, and pressure from every direction pile up in their minds. Causing seemingly endless suffering. Some people fall sick. Some people can not find a solution and end up committing suicide.Happiness is the comforts of life, both physically and mentally, joy, cheer, and pleasure.Our grandparents want us to be able to cope with the uncertainty of life that we never knew to expect. They use every possibility as a lesson to train our minds to prepare to accept the truth of any situation we encounter, because life’s certainty is its uncertainty.Those who never train themselves to accept the uncertainties of life will not be able to accept unexpected loss. Thus, we should train our minds to be as stable as the earth by realizing, the truth of life is its uncertainty.When we experience unexpected disappointment, fear, and torture, we should realize the truth in life that nothing lasts forever. Everything arises, exists, and deteriorates. No one can escape this truth of life.Our grandparents advise4d that, for the mind to be as stable and solid as the earth, we must first realize that, in this world, we are subject to both gratification and disappointment; it is a matter of which will come first.The Lord Buddha taught the eight factors that cause a human’s gratification or disappointment. They are called the Eight Worldly conditions (Loka Dhamma), which and be divided into two categories: Causes of an Infatuated Mind and causes of a Frightened Mind.The infatuated mind wishes to receive what we love and what we like, which includes:1) Fortune is the material rewards, such as a house, car, spouse, property and jewelry.2) Prestige is rank, status, authority, and power3) Recognition is a compliment, praise, or the admiration of the others.4) Happiness is the comforts of life, both physically and mentally, joy, cheer, and pleasure.These are what mist people like, If they do not have them they will search for them. When they attain them they will hold onto them. The more they try to hold them, the more anxious they become. The more anxious they become, the more jealous they become. The mind that has these feelings considered to be an infatuated mind.
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