Understanding Parenting and Marital Life : หน้า 30/62

may feed, raise, teach and do everything for the child, she cannot expect him or her to be everything she wants him or her to be. Sometimes the child would obey her but other times they would not. As the child grows older, they might even become the complete opposite of what the mother wants them to be. Each person has his own thoughts, speech and actions that no other person can control. For this reason, our child is never truly 'ours'. No one in the world, be it husband, wife or child belongs fully to another person. The only person we own is ourselves. Therefore, we should treat ourselves well with good discipline and moral values. Life Has Its Limitations A married life has its limitations. Compare a fish that lives in a bowl to a fish that lives in the ocean or compare a caged bird to a bird that can fly freely in the sky. While each lifestyle has its benefits and disadvantages, it cannot be denied that having a family does confine our life and limit our freedom. We will not always have time to pursue meditation, do the things we enjoy or pursue our hobbies when our spouse and children demand our time and attention. Living a layman's life makes it difficult to practice all the virtues that are required if one wishes to become an Arahant (an enlightened being who is free from defilements and no longer subjected to rebirths or has reached Nibbana). A layman can attain a certain level of spiritual achievement, but those who wish to reach enlightenment need to be ordained as a monk, nun, or practice a life of complete purity. Many couples get married because they feel a mutual desire to start a family. However, as we have come to realize, life partners do not share only one goal but many. Some have made pursuing Perfections and keeping The Precepts as their primary life goal. Therefore, as life partners who are in pursuit of Perfections together, they should thoroughly consider how they will live their lives if one of them decides to live a life of chastity. In Buddhist history, there are many examples of different couples and how each pursued Perfections. Visakha is one example. In her pursuit of Perfections, PDF created with pdfFactory Pro trial version www.pdffactory.com