Wisdom for Marriage: Ten Suggestions from a Father to His Daughter : หน้า 41/207

When they reached Magadha, which was 112 kilometers from the capital of Kosol, Tanachai asked King Pasantikosol, "The city is small and I have a large number of retinue with me. It will be inconvenient to live in the city. I request permission to build a new town in this comfortable part of the country." The king granted his request and Tanachai developed a new town named Sakethu. This name of this town can be found in Indian history and it still exists today. Lady Visakha also had a grandfather whose name was Menataka who was one of the richest men in Magadha. Her family had a very important role in the economy of both counties during the time of the Lord Buddha. **Ten Suggestions From a Father to His Daughter on Her Wedding Day** When she came of age Lady Visakha was to be married to the son of another family in Kosol. Her father gave her the following advice: 1. Do not let the internal fire become external. Do not reveal any family problems for the people outside the family to know. 2. Do not let the external fire come within. This means to not bring external problems into the house. 3. Give to those who give to us. If we are capable of helping those who need it, we should. Then, if they are capable, we may rely on their help if we are in need. 4. Do not give to those who give nothing to us. If you are taken advantage of by people to whom you offered assistance, or if they refuse to help you when you are in need, then do not help them again and do not rely on their help in the future. 5. Whether they give or not, be generous to our relatives. If our relatives have fallen on hard times and seek your help, you should help them even though they may never return the things we lend them. They are still our relatives. 6. Make sure that the food is amenable. One should make sure that the meals served to the family are wholesome and that the relatives are taken care of when it comes to food. 7. Find an appropriate place to sit. This means one must know and show the proper level of respect. For example, it would be disrespectful to sit on a higher place than one’s mother-in-law. Showing appropriate respect at the dinner table will allow for a peaceful mealtime. 8. Find an appropriate place to sleep. One should make sure that the sleeping area for each person in the family is appropriate. Be prepared to rise before anyone in the family