Dhamma for Laypersons: The Vital Heart of a Stable Family : หน้า 9/207

The following subject matter is very important for all families; whoever wants to get married, whoever wants to have children, whoever wants to have a husband or a wife must study these pages to gain a deep understanding. This is because all problems that develop in a family revolve around these issues. If they study this text carefully, they will benefit greatly. But if they lack an understanding of this, they will face many troubles. This knowledge is called, "Dhamma for Laypersons (Gharavas-dhamma): the Vital Heart of a Stable Family.' A Family's Typical Problems Before a person gets married, he/she already has a set of imperfections. But when two people form a family, they are unable to avoid conflict arising from these imperfections. Thus, any family who lacks even one element of the Dhamma for Laypersons - the four elements being truthfulness (Sacca), self-control (Dama), endurance (Khanti), and sacrifice (Caga) will certainly experience one or more of four problems: 1) The problem of suspicion. 2) The problem of foolishness, of not keeping up with the world, people, or surrendering to defilements. 3) The problem of being tired of each other. 4) The problem of selfishness. It is best not to allow these four major problems to arise in the family. If they begin to materialize, then quickly find a solution so that they do not increase in magnitude. These very problems can escalate to such a degree that they can become persistent and endless. Problem #1: The problem of suspicion. In today's world, although people may be part of the same family, a typical disease that develops is suspicion. It is not only between husband and wife that suspicion increases, and not only among siblings, but there is also suspicion between parents and children. So there is no need to even mention others who are not part of the same bloodline or people who are not in the same family. They don't have this disease. The fact is, there are many facets to suspicion. Some suspicions are caused by jealousy, some are because of inequality, some are due to unfairness, and the most dangerous suspicion results from a lack of responsibility. No matter what the source of suspicion is, the longer family members live with each other, the more suspicion can increase. The Warm Hearted Family The Heart of the Family The Warm Hearted Family 17 The Heart of the Family