The Four Problems in Marriage : หน้า 25/216

Part One: Family Life These are: Truthfulness (Sacca), Self-Control (Dama), Endurance (Khanti), and Sacrifice (Caga). When lacking in any of these principles, conflict or discord will arise in any human relationship, causing the following problems: 1. Distrust: Distrust is caused by a lack of truthfulness (sacca). This does not happen just between a husband and wife, but between siblings or between parents and children. Distrust sparks the many facets of suspicion and discord with others. Some cases are caused by jealousy, some by inequality, some by deceitfulness, and some by a lack of responsibility. No matter what source of suspicion there is, the longer the family members live with one another, the more suspicion will arise if it goes unchecked. 2. Stagnation: Stagnation occurs when people lose their motivation to improve their own intelligence, knowledge, or abilities. It is caused by a lack of self control (dama). Often, one spouse will feel stagnate while the other will strive for self-improvement. This problem is not due to rigidity per se, but because other family members are constantly adapting to new situations and those who lag behind refuse to adapt to changes or improvements. They languish and continue to do what they are accustomed to doing. These people have a difficult time changing and, likewise, others can have a difficult time pulling them along. Family Day By Day 23 The Four Problems In Marriage